Dear LPG,

I want to talk to my fellow readers about a little habit that my mother has and that I feel will, one day get her into trouble.

She has a smart phone, which some may think somewhat ambitious in her late  eighth decade of life, but she has lots of family who live abroad and these days keeping in touch is far easier and much cheaper when using one of these devices.  On-line communication apps like WhatsApp allow one to be seen and heard and as I have heard said before in articles I have read on this website, there is something magical about being able to communicate in this way.  I have to agree that being able to see and hear a person you are talking to, who lives on the other side of the world, makes the experience much more real and leaves the people enjoying the conversation feeling a lot closer to each other.

But back to my mother and her bad habit; My mum has yet to learn how to make sure that she has finished her call and cut the person she is talking to off properly, which often leaves the person on the other end of the line being able to listen to everything she is saying (in my mother’s case this is often me). 

Invariably modern day phone calls can be short and often likely to interrupt something you are saying to someone else these days.  When interrupted in this way my beloved mum  has the ability to address the first part of a sentence to the person she is talking to on the phone and then, in the often misguided knowledge that she has cut that call off, work her way back to the conversation she was having with someone she was talking to face to face (or sometimes even on another phone call).  Sometimes this is a comment about the person she has just disconnected from except that she has not always disconnected properly.  This leaves the person she was talking to hearing her comment.

In my mother’s case the comments are usually humorous and without malice, but I keep warning her that she needs to be sure that she disconnects properly because one day her habit could leave her in trouble.

They do say that as we get older we often get into the habit of saying what we think, in other words, talking to ourselves more.  Which means that comments such as, ‘ That was quick, she can be on the phone for ages’  are likely to just pop out immediately after you have called someone.  Not said maliciously but no one wants to hurt someone else’s feelings. 

So I would advise all users of any phone, to make absolutely sure that you take a minute at the end of each call to make sure that you have really disconnected it before you continue any other conversation you are in the middle of.

WT, Lewisham.

LPG could find no universal advice on line which will work for the many different types of phone that we have on the market, but we suggest that getting into the habit of checking the phone visually will help.  Trying the call again and making sure that you hear a ringing tone is another way to be sure, although you make a missed call that way and could well find that the person you call will ring you back.