Dear LPG,   

I was googling one night not so long ago because I could not sleep and, because I could not sleep, it occurred to me to google anything that might help me to relax.  I soon found myself looking at YouTube  videos on the subject and noticed just how many internet experts there are and how their ideas of the perfectly peaceful scene differ.

I found many that showed clouds and scenes of rivers and lakes both of which quite disturb me because, throughout my long life, I have never managed to learn how to swim and have always found flying really worrying too.  

Then there were the ones that focussed in on animals.  Sweet little kittens and puppies and butterflies seemed to feature a lot.   While I have nothing against them, I have to admit to not really being a fan of animals, so I ruled those out.  

Plants, trees and grass  were also quite heavily included in the images and I noted that they were almost  always buds or flowers in full bloom rather than those on their way out, but plants are nearly always shown out in the wild and wide-open spaces which take me to mental places where I feel more vulnerable and lonely than anything else.  Then I found an autumn one,  which though very golden showed falling leaves which somehow remind me of nothing but the word ‘goodbye’; not my favourite if I am honest. 

The underwater ones left me gasping for air even though the music was quite nice.  The wintery ones made me feel cold although it was not that cold a night, and the beach scenes succeeded in making me feel much  too hot with the threatening long expanses  of sand reminding me that I was on my own again.

I have decided that a video of one of my favourite old films replayed for the 60^th time was the best way forward for me.  It seemed to bore me back to sleep!

SF, Telegraph Hill

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