Dear LPG, 

I wonder how many of us really notice the odd changes in people we see when we are out and about our weekly routine.  We tent to see and then dismiss most things while we get on with our own busy lives until we get together with friends for a chat.

It is something that I promised myself I would stop doing one year as my New Year’s Resolution, and while I think that I am a bit better at not passing comments about the weird hat that Mrs.  X wore to church last week or the fact that Mr Y does not appear to be as cheerful as usual, I still find myself having a bit of a chat about my observations with a few chosen friends from time to time… well, if I am honest quite a bit.

It is human nature that we talk about what we can see around us and, after the weather and a chat where we swap stories about our own little problem of the day, what is a conversation with friends’ natural progression?  I have come to the conclusion that it is not a bad thing to chat about what we observe because for one thing, try as I may, when I get together with friends, we just can’t help it.

Perhaps the resolution I should have made is that when such an observation has been made we find Mr Y or Mrs X and try to bring them into our little friendly chatting circle so that we can find out why the change in them that makes them an amusing passing topic of conversation has taken place; and if that fails, a one on one chat with a person you usually don’t talk to can sometimes break the ice and allow that person, who may really have a problem which appears to them to have no solution, to share it. 

I think that sharing your problems with a professional, and usually younger person can be valuable but there is nothing like finding someone your own age to talk to; someone who has perhaps been in the negative position you find yourself in or even someone who has been there, come out the other side, and can offer a new perspective or a solution you have not yet thought of.   When you are upset you can find yourself going through the motions while you keep things to yourself at which point someone who offers to talk to you might just be what you need.

I think that talk or communication is the one most important pastime that we have and sometimes just being given a new opportunity to open up about a problem can be just what is needed.  After all, every now and then we all become Mr Y or Mrs X.

GW, Crofton Park