Dear LPG,

Christmas is here again and it comes with the usual pandemonium, but if you are a pensioner (or anyone else for that matter) who has a family, I urge you to have a good celebration that includes as many of them as possible. 

I am just an average pensioner and I bet I am part of a relatively large, but very average, family.  I also know that there will be many readers who know what it is to have a relatively dysfunctional family, I know that some of the petty squabbles, and arguments that have become a part of the relationships between members of my family make getting all of them in the same room a real challenge, even though it is just for a few hours.

When I was young enough to be the host for my family Christmas, I always tried to encourage the feuding ones, whatever the severity of their disputes, to spend a part of Christmas evening together even though it did not always work.  If sitting round the same table causes conflict, a few mince pies and presents can ensure that they at least see each other once a year, and even if you are not a Christian, the fact that it’s one of the few times in the year when most commerce and industry closes down, makes it easier for family to get together than at any other.

The Christmas before last nearly every member, including all the ‘warring factions’ of my family found themselves in the same room (my daughters living room) at the same time for about an hour or two, which was a bit of a miracle in itself.  I was one of the oldest family members there and perhaps I was the one who appreciated seeing my two sons in the same room (though at opposite ends of it for the most part) in spite of their differences. Their children and grandchildren had a rare opportunity to meet, mobile phones clicked a lot, and the camcorder was in the corner of the room recording the event, the presents and chaos that having 18 people, half of which were children, in the same room left little time for arguing, and in spite of the noise it was good to see everyone together. 

By the time we had reached the Christmas after, two of those family members (including one of those sons) were no longer alive, but the pictures and memories are.

The whole thing reminds me of the Sainsbury’s Christmas television advert which aired in 2014 and portrayed the first world war Christmas day cease-fire.  That has become the illustration I use when asking those family members who would rather not be there to attend.

So can I appeal to the older and arguably more level-headed family members, to do their best to ask that everyone set aside their differences and discontent, and be prepared to suffer the ones they would rather not be in the same room with, just for the day so that each can take an hour or two to at least acknowledge their origins.  Make sure you have the best Christmas you can because there may not be another opportunity and there are quite enough people who will have no choice but to spend the day alone.

Happy Christmas

MM, Catford

MM has found the advert and asked us to remind readers…

(►►►)