Dear LPG, 

I suppose I could be described as a sort of ‘hi tech’ pensioner.   I like to think that I have not yet lost my technological edge.  I have one of those ‘hi tech’ sons who works with computers.  In his home, his television, lights and quite a lot more work when he tells them to, when he is on the way home and he flicks a switch on his mobile phone or when he has pre-set them to, and he has my home wired up somewhat too.  

I know that many older parents complain that their children don’t make enough time for them but my middle aged little one is always on the phone.   So much in fact that, even though working from home is becoming less fashionable again he is in contact during his commute, during lunch hour, when at the shops; let’s just say at least three times a day.   Because I have other things to do and I don’t want to discourage his many daily calls, I have learned the beauty of becoming hands-free and when I am out of the house the answer for me is earphones… 

The problem is that your ears get used to the feel of the earphones in the end and you even forget they are there sometimes or fail to notice when they are not.   

The other day he called to tell me a story.   He had a bit of a cold and when in the loo experienced a bit of a sneezing event.  One sneeze was quite extreme and the jolt to his head flicked one of his earbuds out and he told me that he heard three little sounds, ‘clink clunk plop’.  He then realised that it was the sound that one of his ‘hi tech’ earbuds made on its way to the sink as he was washing his hands.

I have lost one or two over the years and I get upset whenever it happens but, now that they come in pairs, I employ the same technology as I used when it came to making sure that both his gloves came home with him from infant’s school all that time ago.  Do you remember when we mums had their gloves attached to each other via a long bit of elastic that stretched from one to the other via their coat sleeves? I now usually use a length of see-through elastic thread and told him that the result when one of mine drops out is that I have more of a two-word experience, ‘ping, swing’ as the fallen implement drops and is suspended on my shoulder.

My earphones usually cost about £20.00 or so as opposed to the £250.00 price of the state-of-the-art ones that he uses, but that is nothing in comparison to the cost of hearing aids these days and I know a couple of friends who have had a similar experience with losing them where the average cost can often be a lot nearer £1000.00.

So, I just wanted to remind those readers who have taken to sticking anything in their ears on a regular basis, of the value of a length of elastic thread and a knot or two at each end if you can find a place to attach them… 

It is interesting to note how many pairs of things we seem to have to deal with these days, ‘hi tech’ or not.  

BC, Lewisham