Dear LPG, 

I think children grow up far too fast these days so as well as the clothes, I like to include a good old-fashioned toy when it comes to the grandchildren’s birthdays and Christmas presents.

But there is no doubt about it, finding any present for a grandchild is a minefield as I found out when my granddaughter reached the ripe old age of 4. One of the problems is that their parents have bought them nearly everything they will ever need, leaving us other relatives, without much choice.

One day during that pre-present buying period when my time is spent agonising about what would be best, I took her shopping, and she pointed out a doll she would like, it was a cheerleading Barbie doll, and I thought that this year’s dilemma was solved, but I do have a present buying code and followed it to the letter.  

I approached mum and dad before the birthday purchase to ensure that my planned presents would not offend, and I got the all clear. They told me that they planned to get her a doll-related gift too. 

The big day came, and mummy and daddy had bought her a well-furnished Barbie dolls house and three Barbie-sized dolls to go with it, so I thought my authentic cheerleader would blend in perfectly, but not so.  

After the tremendous present-opening ceremony, I was taken to one side and told that her cheerleading swimming costume was a little too scanty (in jest, I think), but I always tried to please and felt that I had missed the target this time.  

The next time that I looked after her, I decided to deal with the situation by taking her shopping to buy the doll an outfit that covered more of her plastic skin, but I still got it wrong. 

We looked through all the Barbie outfits, and she chose a complete outfit including pink pyjamas, a long flowing pink dressing gown and shoes. We went home, dressed the doll and sent a picture to mum and dad using the power of WhatsApp, but the answer came back that I had now got her ready for a date with Ken.

In this more liberal day and age, I thought that a doll was a good idea, but my cardinal rules for grandchild present-buying need to be updated to… 

‘Ask first and make sure that mum and dad get to see a picture before you get the present!’  

CS, Southwark