Dear LPG

Things are one of the most important commodities that we old people have, and I can identify with everything that NH’s recent message had to say on the subject of what will become of them when you are no longer there to appreciate them (►►►).  But reading between the lines brought me back to the sadness that I used to feel when I think of the uncertainty of my own collection’s future. 

I also spend quite a bit of time going through my things without being able to decide to part with many of them, but I feel that her mention of making the back stories known is an important one.  

She mentioned trying to throw a few facts about some of them into a family dinner-party conversation. Still, suppose you have a reasonably large one. When the whole family are together, the youngsters are usually preoccupied with their mobile phones and catching up with each faction’s recent family history. It can be challenging to get a word in edgewise. Somehow, the fact that you were given anything from a bit of jewellery to an old bible by your great uncle just after the 2nd world War ended makes it hard to compete with the request for advice that your daughter is asking the family for because she is at her widths end when it comes to finding a way to stop your six-year-old grandson from arguing at school.  

I have also tried talking about parts of the family history that I have been party to, but that has not worked so well for me either. However, it occurred to me that recording such stories might be a way forward.  

I have long since given up wanting to write what would amount to a series of essays on the subject of anything. Still, I find that when some of my younger family members come to visit, we oldies tend to hear all their problems at school, university or work, and the only thing we get the opportunity to contribute to the conversation is a list of all our aches and pains. 

But recently, I had an idea that is working quite well. I have asked some of my grandchildren if they could help me write some of my story down, and I now have a couple who have taken on the task. They use a tape recorder, I tell my stories, and I get the hard copy back when they have written it all down. When I mention what my version of life years ago was like, they ask me questions that remind me of some of the details I would have ordinarily missed.  

We started with my old photo albums. These snaps can be an excellent way of remembering what you did, and I find the kids interested in what their parents were like when they were young. The back stories of many intrinsic things often follow, and we all know that writing things down will help them remember. There is also something empowering about being able to talk about your history.   

I find that when they come over to work on my story, the purpose of the visit is not overtaken by their situations. I hope that because the mission is clear when sorting some of my things when the time comes, the intrinsicality of my beloved items might make them a little more appealing to the generations of my family that I leave behind.  

SF, Forest Hill