Dear LPG, 

I never cease to be amazed by the subjects that come to mind when a couple of people get talking and just how much you don’t know about acquaintances you may have known for years until you have the time for one of those deeper, thought-provoking chinwags that perhaps only we pensioners can find the time for.   That is when the oddest of subjects will surface, the ones that we all have experience of but that we never really have the time to talk about when life is so fraught with all those things that we have to do each day.  One of the best things a retired lifestyle affords many of us, is real opportunities to pass the time of day at our own pace if we are outgoing enough.   

I am one of those people who is able to strike up a conversation with almost anyone I meet and I enjoy doing it.  I recently met someone in the park and the subject of where we find ourselves in the small hours found its way to the top of our agenda. 

We swapped phone numbers and were discussing the best times to call each other when he mentioned that he was often up and still awake during those small hours which are thought to be the most antisocial for calling anyone. 

Ever since we humans first had telephones (and my recollection goes back to when they were only available in a red box at the end of the street for most people), there was an unwritten rule about the times that it is acceptable to make a telephone call.   

I remember the 1950s when most people only had access to one found in a telephone box and it was not uncommon to make a call and ask whoever answered to knock on a local front door and tell the person behind that they needed to take a walk and have a chat. I also remember when the evenings and weekends would often find telephone boxes with significant queues of people waiting to use them.    

Then quite a few people got their very own in-house model but there was no point in phoning at the wrong times, and I bet that anyone old enough to be reading this will remember the inconvenience of the party line.  There was nothing more awkward than picking up the phone only to find that the other party was having a chat and you had to wait before you could make your call.  


Before picking up the receiver, most would accept that a call to a friend should be avoided between 9-5 on weekdays, but on Sundays the calls got longer once we no longer needed to walk to the end of the street to make one. 

But oh how things have changed over the years.  Now we nearly all have mobile phones, and we know who is calling before we answer, and we can turn the sound off when we don’t want to.  It has always been accepted that when the phone rings at an antisocial time, there is usually some pretty bad news waiting behind the ring (or should I say ringtone because our ears have so much choice these days).   

One good thing is that if you are one of those people who are wide awake in the middle of the night, having a chat on the phone is the perfect way to pass the time of day. I hail from the West Indies, and they are 5 hours behind us in the UK.  I have many a very early morning chat with friends and family who are talking at the end of what is an acceptable time for a call these days.  

But I am often up and about when our part of the world is supposed to be asleep.  The internet tells that nearly half of us pensioners suffer from a degree of insomnia.  It is no secret that a large proportion of us elders also suffer from loneliness, which has to have its worst affects when you can’t sleep in the middle of the night. 

I feel that the solution should be that older friends swap phone numbers and make use of that generally accepted antisocial time for a chat.  It is sad that so many people might really appreciate having someone to talk to during those small hours. 

Being armed with the telephone numbers of a few habitual insomniacs might be the way forward.  Just imagine being able to find someone to have a midnight chat with, and how that chat might decrease the number of small hours we spend sat in the dark with no one to talk to.  The practice would decrease loneliness considerably; the small hours would be a more pleasant experience for those who can’t sleep, and the beauty of the mobile phone is that you can turn the sound off when you don’t want to receive calls. 

They say that having your phone next to you at night is not the best way forward, but if you can’t sleep anyway, it has its uses…  

WM, Lewisham