Dear LPG,

Although I am an established pensioner, I have to say that until the spring of this year I found myself in the middle.  Lockdown changed things a little, but I live with my dad who is in his early nineties and my grandson who is in his early twenties.   This made for an interesting life of contrasts as you can imagine.

Before the intricacies of lockdown, I would find myself watching life from the middle of two very different paces. My grandson keeping his older relatives on the ball with his comings, goings and rushing around.  He came to live with us while he attends a local college and we older housemates never know when to expect him home, and he often has a new plan that offers little notice as to whether to expect him for dinner or any meal for that matter. But when thinking back to my twenties things were different but somehow very similar when I think of my parents ‘attitude towards my then relatively hectic lifestyle.

My father, on the other hand takes life at a much slower speed now. It is interesting when I think of the importance that routine plays in his life.  Sometime waiting for him to do things at his pace can be frustrating.  There are so many things that he seems to need to do in strict sequence, in order not to forget them, but his mind is still sharp.

I suppose that my life represented the glue that kept things functioning as I did the shopping, made the meals, did all the tidying up and kept some sort of order, but there was one aspect of this life that I found particularly annoying.

I am sure you can imagine the amount of noise I would provoke and how much volume is still needed to ask the simplest of questions to my father who’s ninety-odd years have taken their toll on his hearing.  I find myself making sure he can see my lips’ exaggerated movements while I talk slowly and emphasise my hand gesticulations.

I thought that communication would be different with the influence of college around us, but my grandson’s morning routine is so complex that I am often left behind.  I feel that I am interrupting even when trying to establish what I can get him for breakfast. 

My dad’s choice of television program has to be played loudly so that he can hear, while my grandson and his ear pods are seldom parted, so I have to admit to having invested in my own set of earphones so that I can go about my house work listening to my preferred sounds, the disadvantage being that when you are in your own little world and you turn around to see a housemate who appears to have suddenly materialised, because your too preoccupied to hear them approach, you can get a bit of a start.

So, we ended up spending a lot of the time each tapping the shoulder of the person we wanted to talk to before trying to communicate anything at all, but just before all the covid-19 rules meant that my grandson went back home, I came up with a solution and invented a new rule that I will insist on when normal life resumes. 

I insisted on at least one dinner a week when we all take our earpieces out, unless they are worn for necessity, so that we can have an uninterrupted chat. 

I suspect that our audio-living arrangements are somewhat unique but, if you still have a young family member living in your household, one meal a week where electronics and earphones are banned, truly gives everyone a chance to have a good catch-up session.  I recommend it!

FB, Catford.