Dear LPG,  

I recently found your web site and, having read one readers opinion, I found myself working backwards through some of the previous posts.  Many of them triggered my interest but a post written by JW of New Cross, who talked about the difference between the ways that our children are bringing up their children as opposed to our parents’ approach to the task, fired me to make contact.  (►►►)

I think that she is right when she says that it is the hands-on grandparents that can see the difference most clearly and I know that my young grandchildren, who I babysit regularly, are of the opinion that I am far too strict. I am the grandma who insists that they tidy up after themselves and observe some of those classic little rules when I am left alone with them. 

But I do agree that, while there are some things that need to be taught through the experience that only the older people around a young one can teach, such as road safety and good manners, we oldies definitely need to unlearn a lot about the principles that cause some of the regret that we can feel as we get older.  

Perhaps the way that we children of the 50s and 60s were brought up has left too many of us with a far too cautious attitude and, as old as we are (bad backs, achy knees and walking sticks permitting), we need to take a leaf out of that young and innocent approach to life which, while taking a look at the ‘worst case scenario’ perspective seriously, blurs the middling consequences a little and goes for it.

I suggest that, every now and then, even if we only, manage a one-legged stamp, more of us oldies should, prepare to get very wet and jump right into that proverbial puddle like our grandchildren!   This might just be the last chance that many of us will have to throw caution to the wind and avoid that day in the future when we feel the need to say, ‘I truly regret not trying that now’.  

I think that I would prefer to be able to say, ‘It did go a bit wrong but at least I had a go!’   

TB, Downham.